ENcourage Connection

I hit rock bottom on Tuesday, my husband was driving me to the airport and I was supposed to get on a plane and go to Denver for work. I couldn't get out of the car I was frozen and hysterical. Pure panic. My husband was angry, he didn't understand...why couldn't I just go. When it was apparent that I was not going to be going anywhere, I had to call my boss and tell her what had happened. I reassured her that we were going to the doctor immediately. I think my husband wanted to have me committed, but I convinced him to call our family practioner. My family doctor prescribed me fluoxetine, xanax, and 5 days off work to rest, reset, and process. Today was the first day I took the fluoxetine, and so far so good, although I believe it takes time to build up in the system. I was able to leave the house today and run a few errands, my father accompanied me, but I did drive the car....something I was petrified to do before. I still feel kind of lost, alone and confused. How can it be that just a few short weeks ago I was perfectly fine, sure I had a lot of things on my plate but they were all running smoothly. Now I feel like a giant failure, and so very embarrased. I'm fearing returning to work on Monday. I just don't understand what happened.

• I can relate to all that you posted. You are among people who really understand, cause we have been thought it too. WELCOME Michelle. You are among understanding friends. (n/t) 12:40:42 09/01/2009 Debbie IN California (0)
• Welcome here... 21:48:12 08/30/2009 Pat at ENcourage (0)
• Re: Newly Diagnosed Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia 15:25:09 08/28/2009 meg (0)
• I think what happens.......................m 15:26:44 08/27/2009 Judy (1)
  • Re: I think what happens.......................m 16:03:07 08/27/2009 MichelleH (0)

In Reply to: Newly Diagnosed Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia posted by MichelleH on August 27, 2009 at 11:24:12:

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In Reply to: Newly Diagnosed Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia posted by MichelleH on August 27, 2009 at 11:24:12:

Hello, Michelle!

Glad you found us, and I sincerely hope you'll find info and support here that will give you the help & hope you need.

I founded this board and website several years ago. I was diagnosed similarly in 1978! Boy, am I a fossil, or what!? :)

On the bright side---a very bright side---you'll be happy to know that it is your very intelligence, sensitivity, and creativity that contributed to the entire (complex) "journey" to experiencing panic/agoraphobia. Better yet, it is treatable!

Don't let the many opinions and books and courses overwhelm and confuse you. All the knowledge will eventually add up and lead you to a good place. What's right for one isn't necessarily right for another.

You have no idea how lucky you are. You were diagnosed so rapidly that you will be one who can move forward far more quickly than many others.

Be encouraged!
Pat Merrill (aka, Mrs. ENcourage)

In Reply to: Newly Diagnosed Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia posted by MichelleH on August 27, 2009 at 11:24:12:

Hi Michelle,
I agree with Judy.
I recently saw a therapist who told me that he was surprised that I was able to articulate my symptoms so clearly, and yet he sensed I was under the impression that they were completely physiological.
I have been burning the candle at both ends...3 year old, graduate school, and a new job...clearly my body is trying to tell me to slow down. My panic has been very intense lately.
I am impressed that you were able to keep doing your daily activities. Keep taking those steps...and please..I hope some of your humiliation can subside. This happens to so many amazing people I know. This is not failure but your body trying to tell you to slow things down a bit.
My husband becomes angry also...which doesn't help.
Please continue to come back here when you can and read the articles. So many things play a role (good and bad) in panic: food, vitamins, caffeine etc.
My son is about to become a moving tornado in my just cleaned living room so I must end this post.
Good people visit here with a wealth of info.

In Reply to: Newly Diagnosed Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia posted by MichelleH on August 27, 2009 at 11:24:12:

is that we "stuff" things when life gets hectic and we can accomplish tasks, meet deadlines and think we are coping. Ultimately, though, I think our mind rebels at the overload and says enough. In some cases it may take years and in others it just seemingly happens out of the blue. Regardless of the cause, the solution is to try and understand what is happening. An anxiety episode is very uncomfortable and frigtening, but there is no danger involved. It's only what we think may happen. There are many good books on the subject and reading from what others have experienced is enlightening and also gives us comfort to know that we are not alone, that many others have dealt with this or are dealing with it daily. Coming here will give you some insight from our group and hopefully coping ideas. I have learned a lot from my friends on the board. Judy

In Reply to: I think what happens.......................m posted by Judy on August 27, 2009 at 15:26:44:

Thank you for your response Judy, I am am still learning about this disorder. I also think I am still in a little bit of shock. I never thought I could jeopardize my career in this way. I was very hesitant to take the medication my Dr. prescribed me because I have always been adverse to taking any medicine even ibuprofen unless I absolutely had to. But I realize that something has to give somewhere and if the medication can help me get back on track while I work on the bigger picture then so be it. I guess I just need to take one thing at a time and remember to breathe.